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Everything.". — Unknown. "If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'Keep away from children.'". — Susan Savannah. "Most mothers are instinctive philosophers.". — Harriet Beecher Stowe. "Sometimes I open my mouth and my mother comes out.". — Unknown.


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Funny Mothers Day Messages. #1. To my beloved mom, for the long time owner of my heart, soul, and wealth. Rather, in the past month, my salary is double, right? Thank you for being a mother who is so kind to her son.". #2. Mother, like wine, you get so much more fun as time goes by.". #3.


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Inspiring Mother's Day quotes. 26. "I remember my mother's prayers, and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life." —Abraham Lincoln. 27. "As is the mother, so is.


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3. "Biology may have created Mothers, but society has perfected them." -Unknown. 4. "A mom's hug lasts long after she lets go.". 5. "The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness." -Honoré de Balzac. 6.


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2. "Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children.". — William Makepeace Thackeray. 3. "The influence of a mother in the lives of her children is beyond calculation.". — James E. Faust. 4. "Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall; A mother's secret hope outlives them all.". — Oliver.


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PureWow. 1. "The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found." - Calvin Trillin. PureWow. 2. "When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out."


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Your mind floods with oxygen. Your heart becomes a room with wide-open windows." —Amy Poehler. "Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall; a mother's secret hope outlives.


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View Wish 4296. This Mother's Day, I want to thank you for giving me all the best things in life: your love, your care, and your cooking! Happy Mother's Day! Mother's Day. Funny Messages. View Wish 4280. On this Mother's Day, I want to give you something truly special - some peace and quiet.


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Funny, Mothers Day, Mom. 49 Copy quote. I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli.


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Motherhood: Because privacy is over-rated. —Russ Ediger. A mom is like a best friend who knew you back when you pooped your pants. —Russ Ediger. Mother like no other. More Funny Mother's Day Quotes: Show me a messy house and I'll show you a really fun mom. —Ellen Brenneman.


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Bring smile on your mother's face and tell her how much you love, care and respect her on upcoming mothers day. You can write your wishes and best mothers day funny quotes and sayings on greeting cards and give it to your mom. Card that you will send will express your true love and gift will give a true meaning of it.


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Rose Nylund, The Golden Girls. "My mother used to say: the older you get, the better you get, unless you're a banana.". Woman's Day. 5.


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Funny Motherhood quotes about Mom Magic. Only mom knows which way to slice a sandwich so the flavor doesn't leak out. Things that don't exist: Bigfoot, unicorns, a gas station restroom that mom thinks is clean enough. More mom magic quotes: Only a Mom can make you feel hugged over the phone. Not only can a mom work miracles, she can be.


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Jennifer Lopez. I met my match. She is very demanding, like, I can't believe I have a boss. When my baby wanna eat, she wanna eat. It's not like, "Oh three minutes?". No. Give me the milk now.


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To my dear Mom on Mother's Day, I love you. I especially like your super long voicemails and texts that don't make sense. Mom, I know it's hard for you on Mother's Day. to hide the fact that I'm your *favorite* child. Happy Mother's Day! Happy Mother's Day Mom! Love, your *favorite* child.


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11. Motherhood…the landscape can be rocky but the views are always breathtaking. 12. If you are a mom, you are a superhero, period. 13. There are no perfect moms, and there are no perfect children, but there are plenty of perfect moments along the way.